As you probably know - November 19th, 2008 I was let go from my most resent job. Also as you may or may not know - I hated said job, but I did work very hard, and learned a lot of valuable information, as well as met some really amazing people. So I appreciate it for that, but as for how the work and day-to-day life of working there made me feel, it was miserable.
I've always been able to find joy in whatever I was doing, but a lot of the time it was very shallow. When I was let go, of course I was upset, it was right before the holidays and and I had just moved into a new place, which was a huge cost increase for Ryan and I. I decided to set my concerns aside and just enjoy the holidays and figure out this mess when that was over. The holidays FLEW by and then I was faced with a scary realization. I was happier not working, I'd always known this would likely be true, I've always wanted to have time to work on my own stuff, to focus on my goals and dreams. I think most people would appreciate some time to reflect of their goals and past and futures, but for me it was always more then that.
I've had this dream of being a stay at home wife/mother/artist for my whole life. To be able to just be content in life, doing things I love and becoming a better person a long the way for my struggles. So the holidays are over and then I'm faced with an even scarier situation. Ryan gives me his ok to focus on myself for a while, and not look for a job. To be able to work on refinishing furniture and honing my crafts. I was ecstatic at first of course - "what a prospect, how is this possible... omg... its really time to do this... omg ... I'm getting to do what I've always wanted!" I would think to myself. It was all very exciting, yet I soon found myself sitting on the couch watching bad daytime tv and getting just the bare minimum done around the house to try and keep Ryan from yelling at me. See the problem I was having was working on these projects before was - I was scared. I didn't know if anything would come of it, or if I was just wasting time, so I pushed it all away - even though its what I wanted, I pushed it away out of fear. After I exhausted known contacts in the field to see about a job, I felt deflated, so I just did the bare essentials.
Finally he said something, and gave me "tasks of the day" to get done, laundry, grocery shopping, cleaning the house - normal house wife stuff. So I start day-by-day doing what is my new job. I don't get paid of course, but I do get the satisfaction of knowing that when I come home, or when Ryan comes home, our house will be clean and our laundry will be done... plus we wont starve. :P
That went on for a while, I began to go hiking with my girlfriend Jeannette and her dogs TT and Herk, our new puppy Tawny-Roo is full of energy and I needed the excersize as well. That was going really well for a long time too, Tawny and I really looked forward to seeing The Jeannette Clan and they always shared their excitement as well. Last week Jeannette was busy with out of town guests and I took some time off. Worked on some furniture for the first time in a while, spending close attention to the wood what it needed to be refinished. Focusing a bit more on individual tasks I lay out for myself, rather then depending on Ryan to provide them.
Then something amazing happend this week... on Monday - I woke up with a new sense of understanding of what I needed as a person. I litterally jumped out of bed and was just raring to go. I know what your thinking - "So how long did that last - 2 hours, a day?" - strangely enough - I'm still there. I've been kicking serious ass accomplishing things that I really want to do. I know Ryan is taking a great sacrafice to let me explore this side of myself, and if I don't do anything then it will be all for nothing... but if I try and if I really push myself - it could be the greatest sacrafice we've ever made.
Ryan - I want to thank you so much for letting me take time for me, and for understanding the importance, even when I forgot. I love you so much, and you are truely a great man.
In the past 3 days I've come to a place of comfort, of true self and I hope I never forget it.
Thanks for listening,
Love Always,
Kela
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Monday, March 23, 2009
Ode To Friends That Have Passed
I wrote this small Ode to Sparky after we lost her a few months ago but was unsure if I'd post it for the world, with the passing of my mom's dog Winston, it seemed like a good time to share the thoughts...
Sparky "Sparkplug" - The Plugg Dogger:
Sparky was a dog who could explain life to you in one glance. Who could make you laugh with one silly act of mischief or ungracefulness. She was the kind of dog who you forgot was a dog, instead you felt she was an old friend. When I first met Sparky, I was sitting next to her master, my future husband - and she let me know just who was there first. Over time she let me in and we grew to not only love - but understand each other. To depend on each other for comfort when we were sad or just having a lazy day. Her heart and soul will be with mine forever. Sparky, I will miss you, I hope you are finally pain-free and able to do all you wanted.
Love you...
Winston:
Last night my mom's dog Winston passed away. He was the kind of dog that made you want to be a better person. I have a few stories to share that I think will let you know what I mean. See Winston was born with some genetic abnormalities - I don't know the technical terms, but he was born with little lesions on his brain and either missing kneecaps, or having severely malformed knees on his back two legs - these two things combined meant that he had a had time walking at all, or even standing for that matter. The joke was that he was drunk all the time, cause that's how it looked. My mom found him on a website, he was all the way in Russia and because of his physical problems he was going to be euthanized at the young age of ... well I don't know the details, but he was definitely still a puppy. My mom argued and faught for him to have a chance, and eventually had to pay perhaps too much in some peoples eyes to have him shipped to the states so she could give him the life he deserved. The day he arrived I remember sitting in the front yard with him, my mom was unloading things from the car. He was a little parana! I was wearing a skirt that day and he was in my lap nibbling all over the place wiggling like a little worm. At this point, he seemed extra wiggly, but not really any different then a regular puppy... but as he started to grow up and need to move more on his own, his difficulties really began to show. Playing with him in the backyard when I'd go over to their house was always such a happy occation, and one time when he was about a year old I remember playing with him and he was having an especially hard time getting up, and moving around, he just kept falling down. This is the moment that signified who Winston was as a personality for me... so he's falling down over and over for like a good minute straight, so he takes a second, as he's laying on the ground, takes a deep sigh as if he's saying "OK... next time I'm gonna stay up!" and he looked proud and determind as he stood up and with a big ol' silly pup-grin comes barreling down the way towards me. He was a strong, happy, life-lovin dog who never let his disabilities weigh him down, something I think we could all learn from. As time went by my mom payed for various surgeries and options for him to have an easier time, and that along with lots of practice and hard work, and happiness on his end, towards his end he rarely fell over at all, he was just a happy go-lucky little guy, and his gorgeous spirit will surely be missed.
Thanks for listening,
Kela
Sparky "Sparkplug" - The Plugg Dogger:
Sparky was a dog who could explain life to you in one glance. Who could make you laugh with one silly act of mischief or ungracefulness. She was the kind of dog who you forgot was a dog, instead you felt she was an old friend. When I first met Sparky, I was sitting next to her master, my future husband - and she let me know just who was there first. Over time she let me in and we grew to not only love - but understand each other. To depend on each other for comfort when we were sad or just having a lazy day. Her heart and soul will be with mine forever. Sparky, I will miss you, I hope you are finally pain-free and able to do all you wanted.
Love you...
Winston:
Last night my mom's dog Winston passed away. He was the kind of dog that made you want to be a better person. I have a few stories to share that I think will let you know what I mean. See Winston was born with some genetic abnormalities - I don't know the technical terms, but he was born with little lesions on his brain and either missing kneecaps, or having severely malformed knees on his back two legs - these two things combined meant that he had a had time walking at all, or even standing for that matter. The joke was that he was drunk all the time, cause that's how it looked. My mom found him on a website, he was all the way in Russia and because of his physical problems he was going to be euthanized at the young age of ... well I don't know the details, but he was definitely still a puppy. My mom argued and faught for him to have a chance, and eventually had to pay perhaps too much in some peoples eyes to have him shipped to the states so she could give him the life he deserved. The day he arrived I remember sitting in the front yard with him, my mom was unloading things from the car. He was a little parana! I was wearing a skirt that day and he was in my lap nibbling all over the place wiggling like a little worm. At this point, he seemed extra wiggly, but not really any different then a regular puppy... but as he started to grow up and need to move more on his own, his difficulties really began to show. Playing with him in the backyard when I'd go over to their house was always such a happy occation, and one time when he was about a year old I remember playing with him and he was having an especially hard time getting up, and moving around, he just kept falling down. This is the moment that signified who Winston was as a personality for me... so he's falling down over and over for like a good minute straight, so he takes a second, as he's laying on the ground, takes a deep sigh as if he's saying "OK... next time I'm gonna stay up!" and he looked proud and determind as he stood up and with a big ol' silly pup-grin comes barreling down the way towards me. He was a strong, happy, life-lovin dog who never let his disabilities weigh him down, something I think we could all learn from. As time went by my mom payed for various surgeries and options for him to have an easier time, and that along with lots of practice and hard work, and happiness on his end, towards his end he rarely fell over at all, he was just a happy go-lucky little guy, and his gorgeous spirit will surely be missed.
Thanks for listening,
Kela
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Cross Roads... again...
Hey All,
I know its been a while, but I've been soul searching. The whole economic system is crashing down, and more then a few people I know are currently unemployed and hunting for anything and everything that they can. I have friends going to school to do something important and others who've found what they were looking for and are in a safe and encouraging jobs. Yet I sit at home, cleaning, pondering, watching Roseanne reruns and wishing that my future career would just happen already. Yes I realize that careers don't JUST happen... you have to make them happen... but how? How is it when it feels right to your head, its not right for the economy? Or the other way around.
I've always known I wanted to do something creative and freeing from a regular office job, to be able to create and dream a career and watch it take shape, to work hard and get myself dirty making my dreams happen. Now I feel like I'm ready for this, but there are no jobs, especially fun creative ones, everyone is scared and holding out for a better future... how can I wait and hold out for something better - when I'm ready now? The idea of settling terrifies me... I think "Well I'm young, I've got plenty of time, why not just go and get whatever nice office job you can find for now... and down the road you can tackle this dream of yours?" but then I flash forward in my head and I'm suddenly 45 and working at some stupid office job as a temp and wanting to jump of the golden gate bridge! That kind of job has been slowing breaking me down for years and I know that its in my soul and my hearts best interest to reach for the stars and try and get what I've always wanted.
I feel like I'd be settling, giving up on my dreams and it scares me to think what that might do to me over time, down the road. I guess I'm a wanna-be optimist, thinking that if you want something enough, or believe something better can happen - then it will. Yet everyone I talk to says that I'm being silly and should just get what I can job wise - everyone's unemployed - its not a time to be picky. I've been out of work without looking for just over 2 months now, haven't looked for a job at all and I know I'm losing what motivation I have left on the idea of going back to an office job. I guess there was a part of me that believed that everything would fall into place if I was sure it was what I wanted... but life is never that easy... why would I think it would be this time? Would I want it to be? Isn't the struggle what makes it all worth while?
I have always struggled with "what would I want to do if I could do anything?" I am afraid that I'll commit to something, and find that I hate it once I get there. Or I just think that those types of dreams are silly and I should just have a stable job and start my family and call it my life. Then I remember or rather shout at myself in my head that I wont ever be successful (in my mind) doing that kind of work, it isn't me. I am a super crazy passionate person who loves to do anything creative, but in the world of taxes, and supreme courts and war, is there room for a free spirited art freak?
So after contemplating on it for a while, I came up with furniture refinishing. It seemed like the ideal job for me, its something I have a nature talent for - having refinished a few pieces already with no instruction or guidance, I'm a trial by error kind of girl and so far so good. I know a few people interested in me doing pieces for them, and it seemed like the ideal thing. I have a friend who is a contractor and recently unemployed - I was going to ask him if he wanted to try and start this business with me, start small out of our garages and make peoples dreams come true on wood, just a little elbow grease and polyurethane! lol! I haven't been able to talk to that friend yet, but I have talked to a few other people I know in the business and the results were less then encouraging. Its a hard time to get into something as luxurious as that. People cant pay rent or buy their groceries and I want to ask them to pay me to fix up their grandmas antique dresser? It was a great idea... but again this damn economy screws everything up.
I still want to believe that anything is possible and if I reach for my dreams that things will happen eventually... but then my fear takes over and I start to doubt myself, what if I'm not good enough at anything to ever have a sucessful job? What if I'm never safe enough in my career to have my family? I had always wanted to have my first baby by 25... and my 25th birthday was in December... and as you may have guessed - I'm not pregnant. LOL. I've actually made my peace with that... later is fine... not MUCH later... but a bit later... what scares me is that I don't have a plan. There isn't anything set in stone yet, except I'm married to Ryan the love of my life and we have a nice home. I spend my days cleaning the house, planning dinners and over obsessing about my future and my options, or lack there of.
I'm not really sure the point of this blog except that I had a lot on my mind, and it had been a long time since I wrote - so I thought I'd fill y'all in. I just have to try and stay positive and remember that every step in life has its purpose, every moment leads to the next and everything happens for a reason...
One last thing, when I've spoken to my family about these problems of mine, they have all said the same thing - and its something I've thought of all the while myself. Just wanted that to be clear so I don't get 6 comments telling me the same thing. Ha ha ha! I know I can always get a regular office job, and continue to build my portfolio on furniture redesign on the side... but I just fear that I'll loose my sight on what I want to do, and end up settling - because its easier or because I get pregant or whatever, then I'll never do it. That freaks me out. I know that the fact that that freaks me out says that I'll probably stay focused on it and come back later, but what if I dont? Or worse yet, what if I can't find a regular office job??? Scariness.
Well lets end on a happy note, shall we? I know that aren't a lot of people out there who read my blog, but if you know of anyone in the furniture business here in Sonoma County, CA who might be interested in a hard working, insanely passionate, eager to learn furniture refinisher, you just give them my address or let me know! I'm even willing to work on something else, either office or whatever if the people are genuine, I feel like so many office people are fake and manipulating. I just want to be confortable and be myself, somewhere where I can work hard and continue to grow as a person... and as an artist... whatever form of art that takes.
Let me know and WISH ME LUCK!
Lots of Love,
Kela
I know its been a while, but I've been soul searching. The whole economic system is crashing down, and more then a few people I know are currently unemployed and hunting for anything and everything that they can. I have friends going to school to do something important and others who've found what they were looking for and are in a safe and encouraging jobs. Yet I sit at home, cleaning, pondering, watching Roseanne reruns and wishing that my future career would just happen already. Yes I realize that careers don't JUST happen... you have to make them happen... but how? How is it when it feels right to your head, its not right for the economy? Or the other way around.
I've always known I wanted to do something creative and freeing from a regular office job, to be able to create and dream a career and watch it take shape, to work hard and get myself dirty making my dreams happen. Now I feel like I'm ready for this, but there are no jobs, especially fun creative ones, everyone is scared and holding out for a better future... how can I wait and hold out for something better - when I'm ready now? The idea of settling terrifies me... I think "Well I'm young, I've got plenty of time, why not just go and get whatever nice office job you can find for now... and down the road you can tackle this dream of yours?" but then I flash forward in my head and I'm suddenly 45 and working at some stupid office job as a temp and wanting to jump of the golden gate bridge! That kind of job has been slowing breaking me down for years and I know that its in my soul and my hearts best interest to reach for the stars and try and get what I've always wanted.
I feel like I'd be settling, giving up on my dreams and it scares me to think what that might do to me over time, down the road. I guess I'm a wanna-be optimist, thinking that if you want something enough, or believe something better can happen - then it will. Yet everyone I talk to says that I'm being silly and should just get what I can job wise - everyone's unemployed - its not a time to be picky. I've been out of work without looking for just over 2 months now, haven't looked for a job at all and I know I'm losing what motivation I have left on the idea of going back to an office job. I guess there was a part of me that believed that everything would fall into place if I was sure it was what I wanted... but life is never that easy... why would I think it would be this time? Would I want it to be? Isn't the struggle what makes it all worth while?
I have always struggled with "what would I want to do if I could do anything?" I am afraid that I'll commit to something, and find that I hate it once I get there. Or I just think that those types of dreams are silly and I should just have a stable job and start my family and call it my life. Then I remember or rather shout at myself in my head that I wont ever be successful (in my mind) doing that kind of work, it isn't me. I am a super crazy passionate person who loves to do anything creative, but in the world of taxes, and supreme courts and war, is there room for a free spirited art freak?
So after contemplating on it for a while, I came up with furniture refinishing. It seemed like the ideal job for me, its something I have a nature talent for - having refinished a few pieces already with no instruction or guidance, I'm a trial by error kind of girl and so far so good. I know a few people interested in me doing pieces for them, and it seemed like the ideal thing. I have a friend who is a contractor and recently unemployed - I was going to ask him if he wanted to try and start this business with me, start small out of our garages and make peoples dreams come true on wood, just a little elbow grease and polyurethane! lol! I haven't been able to talk to that friend yet, but I have talked to a few other people I know in the business and the results were less then encouraging. Its a hard time to get into something as luxurious as that. People cant pay rent or buy their groceries and I want to ask them to pay me to fix up their grandmas antique dresser? It was a great idea... but again this damn economy screws everything up.
I still want to believe that anything is possible and if I reach for my dreams that things will happen eventually... but then my fear takes over and I start to doubt myself, what if I'm not good enough at anything to ever have a sucessful job? What if I'm never safe enough in my career to have my family? I had always wanted to have my first baby by 25... and my 25th birthday was in December... and as you may have guessed - I'm not pregnant. LOL. I've actually made my peace with that... later is fine... not MUCH later... but a bit later... what scares me is that I don't have a plan. There isn't anything set in stone yet, except I'm married to Ryan the love of my life and we have a nice home. I spend my days cleaning the house, planning dinners and over obsessing about my future and my options, or lack there of.
I'm not really sure the point of this blog except that I had a lot on my mind, and it had been a long time since I wrote - so I thought I'd fill y'all in. I just have to try and stay positive and remember that every step in life has its purpose, every moment leads to the next and everything happens for a reason...
One last thing, when I've spoken to my family about these problems of mine, they have all said the same thing - and its something I've thought of all the while myself. Just wanted that to be clear so I don't get 6 comments telling me the same thing. Ha ha ha! I know I can always get a regular office job, and continue to build my portfolio on furniture redesign on the side... but I just fear that I'll loose my sight on what I want to do, and end up settling - because its easier or because I get pregant or whatever, then I'll never do it. That freaks me out. I know that the fact that that freaks me out says that I'll probably stay focused on it and come back later, but what if I dont? Or worse yet, what if I can't find a regular office job??? Scariness.
Well lets end on a happy note, shall we? I know that aren't a lot of people out there who read my blog, but if you know of anyone in the furniture business here in Sonoma County, CA who might be interested in a hard working, insanely passionate, eager to learn furniture refinisher, you just give them my address or let me know! I'm even willing to work on something else, either office or whatever if the people are genuine, I feel like so many office people are fake and manipulating. I just want to be confortable and be myself, somewhere where I can work hard and continue to grow as a person... and as an artist... whatever form of art that takes.
Let me know and WISH ME LUCK!
Lots of Love,
Kela
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Moving Tomorrow
I don't know why exactly but even though Ryan and I are finally moving into our house tomorrow, I woke up soooo stressed out today. No reason - everything is going sooooo smoothly - everything is set and nothing is going wrong - but for some reason I have this horrific feeling that something will. It's almost like its just going TOO smoothly or something and thats throwing me off. Thought if I wrote everything out it would put my mind at ease.
1.) Set all all the utilities to come on and go off at appropriate houses, on the right days. DONE.
2.) Pack - about 80% done - as good as we can get it until we move some stuff out - living in box land right now.
3.) Deposit - Paid.
4.) Rent due tomorrow - totally have the funds... no worries there.
5.) Anxious to get going... Get to move tomorrow night!
So why am I so anxious and tense... litterally all my muscles in my body are tense and hurty. Yesterday and the day before I've been so sick to my tummy - maybe thats all part of this new found stress too.
I had this dream last night that I had snuck into the new place to show my friend Kim the house... and even though in real life its empty right now - in my dream the landlords lived there with their non-existant daughter. We thought they were gone so we snuck in... then found the daughter asleep on the couch in the living room so we dashed out of there! Then the landlord came running out after us screaming at us "Your moving in tomorrow - why would you rob us?!?!" and I was standing there pleading to him about how it was all a misunderstanding and how much we wanted to live there! Finally he lets it go - but he doesn't think we can afford the place... so him and my mom are teaming up to figure out a payment plan "cause I obviously can't afford it" which is insane cause we can... but dream do weird things right. Finally I scream at them "No - you can put it on my card right now! I can afford to live here!!!" and he and my mom storm off to collect payment. I woke up devistated somehow even though the dream sorta worked out. Talk about stressful, eh?
I know where some of that came from... because the landlords name in my dream wasn't right - his name was the name of the owner of the Bridal Path - which explains some of my anxiety because we bounced a check to them over a year ago... but Ryan and I are completely different people now - much more safe and smart with our funds...
Also yesterday my sister Nicki was worried about Ryan and moving in so soon - deffinitly trying to be helpful and sisterly - but she stressed me out - spouting all these negitives at me, then she had my mom talk to me - although my mom seemed less concerned... she was just playing her part you understand. Then last night my brother tried to loan us money - all covertly - like we were afaid to ask... so I get it - my mind was racing with all these other peoples uncertainties and it got to me... but why don't I feel better knowing this?
I want more then anything for Ryan and I to move into this house... it means so many things for us, a better way of life... a more safe, less stressful way of life... the idea of losing this opportunity seriously makes my heart skip a beat and I loose my breath - I know its unfounded that anything should go wrong... everything has just been so perfect.
I'm sure by 10pm tomorrow - we'll be nessled nicely in our new - slightly chaotic, unpacked home and my fears will be but a fading memory... but right now... I'm anxious.
EVERYONE HOPE THAT TODAY SPEEDS BY UNEVENTFULLY, and SO DOES TOMORROW - I really need it to be 6pm tomorrow right now. LOL!
Wish Us Luck!
Love Always,
Kela
1.) Set all all the utilities to come on and go off at appropriate houses, on the right days. DONE.
2.) Pack - about 80% done - as good as we can get it until we move some stuff out - living in box land right now.
3.) Deposit - Paid.
4.) Rent due tomorrow - totally have the funds... no worries there.
5.) Anxious to get going... Get to move tomorrow night!
So why am I so anxious and tense... litterally all my muscles in my body are tense and hurty. Yesterday and the day before I've been so sick to my tummy - maybe thats all part of this new found stress too.
I had this dream last night that I had snuck into the new place to show my friend Kim the house... and even though in real life its empty right now - in my dream the landlords lived there with their non-existant daughter. We thought they were gone so we snuck in... then found the daughter asleep on the couch in the living room so we dashed out of there! Then the landlord came running out after us screaming at us "Your moving in tomorrow - why would you rob us?!?!" and I was standing there pleading to him about how it was all a misunderstanding and how much we wanted to live there! Finally he lets it go - but he doesn't think we can afford the place... so him and my mom are teaming up to figure out a payment plan "cause I obviously can't afford it" which is insane cause we can... but dream do weird things right. Finally I scream at them "No - you can put it on my card right now! I can afford to live here!!!" and he and my mom storm off to collect payment. I woke up devistated somehow even though the dream sorta worked out. Talk about stressful, eh?
I know where some of that came from... because the landlords name in my dream wasn't right - his name was the name of the owner of the Bridal Path - which explains some of my anxiety because we bounced a check to them over a year ago... but Ryan and I are completely different people now - much more safe and smart with our funds...
Also yesterday my sister Nicki was worried about Ryan and moving in so soon - deffinitly trying to be helpful and sisterly - but she stressed me out - spouting all these negitives at me, then she had my mom talk to me - although my mom seemed less concerned... she was just playing her part you understand. Then last night my brother tried to loan us money - all covertly - like we were afaid to ask... so I get it - my mind was racing with all these other peoples uncertainties and it got to me... but why don't I feel better knowing this?
I want more then anything for Ryan and I to move into this house... it means so many things for us, a better way of life... a more safe, less stressful way of life... the idea of losing this opportunity seriously makes my heart skip a beat and I loose my breath - I know its unfounded that anything should go wrong... everything has just been so perfect.
I'm sure by 10pm tomorrow - we'll be nessled nicely in our new - slightly chaotic, unpacked home and my fears will be but a fading memory... but right now... I'm anxious.
EVERYONE HOPE THAT TODAY SPEEDS BY UNEVENTFULLY, and SO DOES TOMORROW - I really need it to be 6pm tomorrow right now. LOL!
Wish Us Luck!
Love Always,
Kela
Thursday, September 4, 2008
So much to say!
It’s been a really, really, REALLY long time since I’ve blogged – and I feel it was well over due! So much has happened since my last post I am not even sure where to start!
First we have June:
I survived my company's annual convention - a week of fast pace on your feet for 12-15+ hours a day, being friendly, smiling, doing whatever is needed and eating what and when you are told all in a BRIGHT orange polo shirt and a name badge! I deserved a break after that! LOL!
It was an amazing trip!
First we have June:
I survived my company's annual convention - a week of fast pace on your feet for 12-15+ hours a day, being friendly, smiling, doing whatever is needed and eating what and when you are told all in a BRIGHT orange polo shirt and a name badge! I deserved a break after that! LOL!
It was an amazing trip!Then in July:
Shortly after the blues festival - I was at a family function 45 minutes north and suddenly I was very sick! After a pretty horrific drive back down 101 to the hospital, 2 hours and many tests later - I was diagnosed with Pancreatitus - the inflammation of the pancreas! Normal levels of what they call "Lypase" (basically the enzymes that the pancreas releases to digest food) is like 24-300 - mine was at 90,000! I spent 6 pretty miserable days in the hospital, IV fluids and ice chips as my only source of food and drink...Ryan and my family/friends were awesome - I had so many visitors and people supporting me - it was really so humbling. Soon my levels went down and I was allowed real food and eventually discharged! It was really all very exciting in a horrible sort of way! I am not on a special low-cholesterol diet and I've lost about 15+ lbs! Trying to stay active and looking forward to a long time away from the hospital!
Ryan's got this great new job now and we are so close to moving I can just taste it! I just want a home you know? A place we can be proud to call our own. We've lived in our unfortunate apartment for long enough! I just keep thinking about our future, Ryan and I in our cute first house (rented - we can't buy yet - but at lease it's a house and not connected to anyone!) with a cute front yard with a path up to the door - maybe even a real front porch! We'll have the space for all our possessions and room to grow... as a family. We have most of everything we need saved - just waiting for the perfect place to become available - wish us luck!!
Thanks for listening,
Kela
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Kela's Bargain Tip: If you are short on cash but need a suit for less then the average $400-600+ shops - try Burlington Coat Factory in Rohnert Park. It's a little scary "ghetto" on the inside but if you make your way to the suit area - you'll find tons of bargains!
Believe it or not - that pic above of Ryan and I - that whole outfit he's wearing was only $130! He looks good too! ;)
Shortly after the blues festival - I was at a family function 45 minutes north and suddenly I was very sick! After a pretty horrific drive back down 101 to the hospital, 2 hours and many tests later - I was diagnosed with Pancreatitus - the inflammation of the pancreas! Normal levels of what they call "Lypase" (basically the enzymes that the pancreas releases to digest food) is like 24-300 - mine was at 90,000! I spent 6 pretty miserable days in the hospital, IV fluids and ice chips as my only source of food and drink...Ryan and my family/friends were awesome - I had so many visitors and people supporting me - it was really so humbling. Soon my levels went down and I was allowed real food and eventually discharged! It was really all very exciting in a horrible sort of way! I am not on a special low-cholesterol diet and I've lost about 15+ lbs! Trying to stay active and looking forward to a long time away from the hospital!
Ryan's got this great new job now and we are so close to moving I can just taste it! I just want a home you know? A place we can be proud to call our own. We've lived in our unfortunate apartment for long enough! I just keep thinking about our future, Ryan and I in our cute first house (rented - we can't buy yet - but at lease it's a house and not connected to anyone!) with a cute front yard with a path up to the door - maybe even a real front porch! We'll have the space for all our possessions and room to grow... as a family. We have most of everything we need saved - just waiting for the perfect place to become available - wish us luck!!
Thanks for listening,
Kela
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Kela's Bargain Tip: If you are short on cash but need a suit for less then the average $400-600+ shops - try Burlington Coat Factory in Rohnert Park. It's a little scary "ghetto" on the inside but if you make your way to the suit area - you'll find tons of bargains!
Believe it or not - that pic above of Ryan and I - that whole outfit he's wearing was only $130! He looks good too! ;)
Monday, April 28, 2008
Glorious Weekend
Hey!
So I just had a very productive and amazing weekend that I just have to share! So Saturday I woke up with my honey – after sleeping in a little – like 8am -9am – THAT’S LATE FOR ME! LOL! Anyhoo – so we got to the local Big 5 Sporting goods store to go find me either a glove or some tape to cover my old sticky handle of my freebie Tennis Racket I got from a friend with their grandparents pasted away – and ended up finding a really cool new Wilson tennis racket for only $24.99! Totally loved the way it looked and felt, couldn’t wait to try it out! Also got Ryan a backpack so he’d have something to put stuff in on our bike rides, got a great find there too! Like $15-25 and perfect for him!
Then we headed out on a bike ride, didn’t really plan on doing anything specific, just start going down the trails near our house and see where we end up! Well I live near Coddingtown Mall in Santa Rosa, and we ended up going almost all the way to Sebastopol, we went past Willowside Road and then found ourselves at a dead end… there were lots of ways to go we just wanted to see how far in that direction we could go.
So here are some pics… this was about 45-hour into our ride we were riding along this creek the whole time – but stumbled across this picturesque spot with bridges and vineyards down the side:
So I just had a very productive and amazing weekend that I just have to share! So Saturday I woke up with my honey – after sleeping in a little – like 8am -9am – THAT’S LATE FOR ME! LOL! Anyhoo – so we got to the local Big 5 Sporting goods store to go find me either a glove or some tape to cover my old sticky handle of my freebie Tennis Racket I got from a friend with their grandparents pasted away – and ended up finding a really cool new Wilson tennis racket for only $24.99! Totally loved the way it looked and felt, couldn’t wait to try it out! Also got Ryan a backpack so he’d have something to put stuff in on our bike rides, got a great find there too! Like $15-25 and perfect for him!
Then we headed out on a bike ride, didn’t really plan on doing anything specific, just start going down the trails near our house and see where we end up! Well I live near Coddingtown Mall in Santa Rosa, and we ended up going almost all the way to Sebastopol, we went past Willowside Road and then found ourselves at a dead end… there were lots of ways to go we just wanted to see how far in that direction we could go.
So here are some pics… this was about 45-hour into our ride we were riding along this creek the whole time – but stumbled across this picturesque spot with bridges and vineyards down the side:
As we walked around checking out the scene Ryan notices a Mama duck and a whole slew of babies stuck in this fenced area – almost ALL sun… just feet from the creek… she was trying everything she could to find a way out that didn’t involve her leaving her chicks behind… after some thinking we decided to unlatch the latch of the fence, leaving the chain lock – so she could squeeze out… don’t know if she did… but the opportunity was left for her!
Later about 15-20 minutes down the trail we stopped again and found this neat scene:
Here is Ryan posing with his sexy new backpack – GERRR! ;)
The we continued on – past Willowside and found this place… unfortunately the pics don’t do it justice, because it was beautiful, luckily for us that it was there because the trail after Willowside to the dead end – was nothing but giant loose rocks and it was a horrific ride… but that one location made the perilous journey worth it!
So we turn around and about 5 miles from home (we ended up going a total of 13 MILES!!) I really started feeling tired – it was a lot of bike riding for a rekindling biker but the sun was beating down on us pretty good! After a little while of tired biking I suddenly see a giant black and white snake – Ryan says it was a King Snake literally like a foot or two ahead of me, and I couldn’t stop in time- I had to run him over!!! I freaked out and threw my legs up so he wouldn’t get me if he tried, I didn’t know what kind of snake he was – he just looked dangerous – after I ran him over – I felt soooo bad. Ryan said he was alive but squished… the way he was laying – all sunbathing and happy I ran him over like 3+ times in a single swoop! Poor dude! We made it back to civilization and stopped by Safeway for a sandwich.
After we were fed and dressed for regular life again, cleaned up – we went to a pet store and picked up two placostomous’s (I’m sure that’s not proper grammar) and went and introduced them to the tank – they couldn’t believe all the food there was to eat in my tank… I decided a while back that cleaning my tank killed my fish… so I stopped cleaning it… it’s FULL of algae – but also very happy fish! The placostomi’s were totally gorging it was hysterical to watch!
Later we went and picked up Josh and had a nice evening of Burgers and Fries from Stony Point Grill and Dr. Who.
Sunday I woke up with a slightly twisted ankle and it was Tennis day! So I took some advil and went anyway… maybe not the best plan – but we had a lovely time and my racket rocks! By the end of the day Ryan had me on couch arrest and I wasn’t allowed to walk anymore – I am a bad patient when it comes to things like that – he all but had to tie me to the couch to keep me off my ankle… but it seemed to work… I’m much better today!
All in all – it was a glorious weekend!
Hope you enjoyed my story and pics!
Much Love,
Kela
Thursday, April 17, 2008
Magical Journey
So I've been having some personal problems these days, fears for the future mostly. Haven't been sleeping, been late to work... all this fun jazz.... then last night Ryan and I were doing our regular routine... and suddenly remembered that we both had good bicycles now... so we decide to go outside and test them out. After a few minutes I got the hang of it again - its been a while - and this bike is a bit big for me... even with the seat all the way to the bottom, I can just barely touch my tippy toes to the ground - its good times I tell you! LOL.
Anyhoo- so after about 20 minutes or so driving around in our car port area... we venture onto the street and soon find a path past the last house on the cul-de-sac leading to a trail we'd never noticed before! Ryan and I slipped past the last house, thru a little ravine and voila - we were in beautiful nature... the ghetto neighborhood millions of miles away! We've lived here for close to 4 years and never saw this path before... Ryan and I have vowed to go riding every night we can, keep us in shape and unwind after a long day. We rode around for a good hour, hour or two until it got too dark to be safe... close to 9pm LOL. I ended up sleeping better then I have in ... well a LONG TIME... and woke up on time feeling refreshed! Who would have thought!?
Course I'm eating up time sitting here telling you my story... so I gotta get off to work!
Have a great day EVERYONE!
Much Love,
Kela
P.s - Thanks for reading!
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